Live For You (Boys of the South ~ Book 1) Read online

  Despite almost thirty minutes of uninterrupted driving time or because of it, I’m edgier than ever when I pull into a semi-full parking lot next to a warehouse.

  My phone vibrates as I get out of the Jeep. Out of habit I check it.

  Parker: You with Rae now?

  Me: No.

  Parker:???

  I don’t have time to explain. I don’t want to explain. My phone vibrates again. This time it’s Beau.

  Beau: Where r you?

  Me: Warehouse off of Fifth

  Beau: Be there in ten

  I smile. Of all my buddies, he’d be the only one not warning me of the consequences. Lighting another cigarette, I hear the roar of a crowd and start in that direction.

  Baldy meets me at the door. A grin splits his face. “Thought you’d come by.”

  “Tell me what I need to do.”

  “Get rid of the shirt, the piercings and the cuffs. The rest is up to you,” he says, leading me inside.

  It’s nicer than I expected. The place is well-lit and there’s a locker room of sorts. I stash everything, including my wallet, phone and keys in the first open bay, then close the door.

  “Where’s the lock?”

  Baldy keeps smiling. I really need to remember his name. “My associate, Frank, will be standing here the entire time.”

  Frank is about seven feet tall and has hands the size of my head. Yeah, no one will be taking anything from him.

  “What’s up, Frank?”

  Frank grunts, leather creaking as he folds his arms. A flash of silver catches my eyes. The dude is packing.

  My heart races. Maybe it was a mistake coming here.

  Baldy turns to me. “Coming? You’re up next.”

  Frank grunts again and nods his head.

  And maybe it doesn’t matter anymore.

  ***

  I stumble to the opening in the cage, my hip on fire, and I swear that at least three of my ribs are cracked. I can barely see out of both of my eyes.

  Spitting out a mouthful of blood, I glance back at the other guy. My neck screams in protest. He’s lying on the floor, only his chest moving.

  Baldy suddenly appears, another face splitting grin. “Here’s your cut. Two grand. Not bad for your first time.”

  Two thousand dollars, for ten minutes of beating the shit out of some guy whose name I don’t even remember. “Holy shit.”

  “Come back Friday night and do this again, and I’ll triple your cut.”

  The crowd cheers my name. But I don’t get a rush from it. Only when I’m wailing on a dude, pretending he’s all the guys that have done my family wrong, including the mother who hates me, do I feel a rush. A high. A sense of justice in the world.

  And now I’ve found a way to make it profitable. I make a fist, holding tight to my money and grin.

  ***

  “That was insane, Cole,” Beau says as he walks in the locker room. Frank must be a NASCAR fan or Beau threw some serious cash Frank’s way to come back here.

  I’ve showered and washed the blood away, and feel mostly human again. Right after I’d dried off, a medic appeared to check me out. He ended up taping my ribs. Now, I can barely move without wanting to cry but at least nothing’s broken.

  “I know, right? Two grand for ten minutes,” I rub the back of my head with a towel, then get dressed. Slowly. “This Friday, I win again, and it’s triple that.”

  “Nice.” Beau shakes his head, lip ring gleaming. “But you look like hell.”

  I managed to get my shirt back on, but buttoning it up will be a bitch. “Little help here?”

  With a roll of his eyes, Beau strides over and begins buttoning my shirt. “You’re on your own with your pants. I’m not getting my hands anywhere near your junk.”

  “Seriously, bro?”

  “It’s a well-known fact that I’m irresistible to women and men. Sure hate for you to be all caught up in my hotness.” He slips in the last button and steps back. “I saw Parker take your girl home.”

  “Yeah, I don’t think this is her kind of scene.” I grab the rest of my stuff and make myself stride out of the locker room like my entire body doesn’t feel like it needs to lay in bed for the next month. I need to learn how to do kicks like the dude I took down. My advantage during the fight: I can take a hit to the head and I can always find my opponent’s weak spot.

  Once we’re outside, I offer Beau a cigarette and he takes it, lighting up.

  “Where to next?” he asks.

  “Been thinking about getting another tat.”

  “Not enough pain for you tonight?” Beau blows out a thin stream of smoke.

  I pull a bottle of pills out my pants pocket. “Medic hooked me up.”

  He takes it from me, holding it up to the light in the parking lot. “Percocet. That is the shit.” He tosses the bottle to me and takes another drink from his Red Bull. “Want something to wash it down?”

  “Not that crap.”

  We stop at his truck, which is parked two down from my Jeep.

  “I have some water in my truck, from one of my sponsors. I have to be seen drinking it at least once day if I’m out and about,” Beau says.

  The specifics of the contracts Beau signs never fail to amuse or amaze me. I remember one month, he could only be seen wearing a certain brand of sunglasses. Only Beau hated that brand. I think his dad made the deal just to mess with Beau.

  “Hit me with your non-ill gotten gains.”

  Beau unlocks the gate of his truck and rummages around, then throws me a bottle of water. I pop the top off the pills and take a couple, then wash it down. “Ride with me or…?”

  “Only if you’re down with going to—”

  “We’re not going there. You’ll be too high for them to work on.” He motions for me to get in his truck. I climb inside. He starts it up, backs out and heads down Fifth.

  “Take me wherever.” As we drive the Percocet takes effect, leaving me floating on the highway. I’m warm and free as we go.

  Beau hits the gas at the next green light and the truck fast forwards to the next light. Then backs up and does it all over again. I blink, then rub my eyes.

  Next thing I know, we’re standing in a tattoo shop that I know I can’t afford. All slick chrome and hot girls in barely there outfits serving drinks. One smiles and at me and winks.

  Looks like drinks aren’t all they’re serving.

  Beau’s speaking to what looks like the manager. While we’re waiting the room gets that warm and floaty feeling, just like in Beau’s truck. I take that as my cue to sit down.

  My phone vibrates and I pull it out, then answer it.

  “’Lo?”

  “Where are you?” Rae’s voice washes over me. She sounds concerned and not angry.

  “With Beau.” Suddenly, I miss her. She should be here. “You should be here. Drive that sweet ass of yours here and we’ll get something done.”

  “Something done?”

  “Tattoo, baby.”

  “Oh.”

  I take the drink from a rather endowed brunette with blue eyes. But she’s all wrong for me, so I send her on her way. “So you coming?”

  “I can’t.”

  “You can. I’ll give you the address…wait a minute, I don’t know the address….Beau will text you the address and you get in your nana’s truck and—”

  Her thick sigh cuts me off. “I’m not allowed to drive.”

  I frown. “That doesn’t seem right. To leave you all alone, without a—”

  “No, the state of Tennessee says I can’t drive.”

  I blink at the drink in my hand. “But we’re in North Carolina.”

  “Are you drunk?”

  “Nah, girl.”

  “Yeah…so, I don’t exactly want to get into this over the phone, but I had my license taken away after the wreck.”

  In that moment, clarity chooses to make an appearance. “Were you drinking and driving?” This does not fit my image of Rae, but maybe it fits the imag
e of Violet Lynn.

  For long moments, I hear nothing but the sounds of men talking, women laughing and the low buzz of the machines.

  Finally, she says, “Yes.”

  “So you gave yourself that damn scar?” I tighten my grip on the glass in my hand.

  “Cole, can we please talk about this later? When you’re sober?” Her breath hitches and I can hear her crying.

  I hate that she’s crying. I hate that she’s alone. I hate that I realize that I don’t know this girl at all.

  “Ready?” Beau mouths and I nod.

  “Listen, I’ll let you go. Don’t wait up for me or…expect me anytime soon. I found a place and need to get my stuff moved in.” Honestly, I need time to think. I need to time to come off of this shit and actually talk to Rae. In person.

  Another hitch of breath and a muffled sob. “I understand. It was nice knowing you, Cole.” Then she hangs up.

  I stare down at the phone in my hand. What the hell had just happened?

  “Cole?”

  “I think Rae just broke up with me.” I hit number again, but it goes straight to voicemail. There’s no way I’m leaving some half-assed apology on there. I try again and again, until Beau snatches the phone out of my hand.

  “You’re a free agent tonight.”

  I become completely fascinated with the pattern of the tiled floor. “Gimme back my phone.”

  “Only if you promise not to call her again.”

  “Fine.” My phone is shoved under my nose and I take it. “Thanks.” I glance up at Beau. He’s already got his shirt off. His nipples are pierced and there are tattoos of an angel on one hip and a devil on the other. The initials P.S. are on his chest, wreathed in roses and thorns, and I wonder why he hasn’t had that covered yet.

  “Their specialty is pierc—”

  “Oh, hell no. I’m not getting anything pierced below my neck, you damn freak.”

  “God, you’re such a pussy.” He grabs my hand and hauls me to my feet, then shoves me into the closest room. “Go be a human TweetDeck and have quotes less than a hundred and forty characters tattooed on your ass then.”

  A woman is waiting inside as I stumble through the door. She’s not dressed like the ones serving drinks and sex. Instead she’s wearing a black tank, black shorts and black tights with high heel boots. The only color on her—of course—is hair that’s bright pink. And she has a nose piercing.

  “Hi, I’m Rachel.”

  I grunt. “Yeah, you are.”

  “Tell me what you want,” she says, closing the door behind me and then coming around to stand in front of me. “Anything goes around here.”

  I’m pretty damn sure, despite my Percocet state, that if I ask for more than a piercing or a tattoo I’ll get it from her. And since Rae has just broken up with me, or at least it sounds as though she has, I’d be well within my rights as a free agent to ask for more.

  I frown.

  Rachel frowns.

  Suddenly, the memory of Rae, playing her guitar and singing the song she’d written about me comes to mind. That’s what I want.

  I smile.

  Rachel smiles. “Well?”

  I hand Rachel my glass and shove my phone into my pocket. “How do you feel about poetry?”

  *** *** ***

  Violet

  So I had been right. This is exactly what it means to date in the real world.

  No handlers, no parents or managers, or producers even, intervening when you have a fight and making you sing together so you remember what it was that brought the two of you together in the first place.

  Nothing at all, but his words and my words. His assumptions and mine.

  I stare at the image of Cole on my phone. But maybe, despite the pinch in my heart that threatens to turn into vise, he was exactly what I needed.

  Rubbing my hand over my chest, I let the tears fall again. At least this time I’m crying over a guy.

  Sniffing, I toss the phone on my dresser and pad to the kitchen to defrost thick slices of chocolate layer cake. I’m an adult and I’m allowed to sleep in until noon, then have dessert for lunch.

  But before I can even get to the freezer, the phone rings. I don’t want to answer it, but if I don’t, and then Nana doesn’t then, there’s the very real possibility that my parents will fly down here.

  I click the talk button. “Hello?”

  “This is Georgia from Forrestville Elementary and I have a sweet little girl sitting with me. We got out of school early and no one was at the Morgan house, and since Kelly is in Kindergarten, the bus driver’s required by law to bring her back to school.”

  “Cole can’t come get her?”

  “He’s not on the approved list.”

  “List?”

  “Look honey, I’d love to keep talking but someone is getting s-c-a-r-e-d that no one is c-o-m-i-n-g. Can you come get her, Ms. Givens?”

  Oh crap. She thinks I’m Nana. Guess they don’t put ages down. “I’d be happy to come get her….” But I’m not supposed to drive. All I have is my ID, enough to prove who I am but that’s but it.

  “Oh thank you.” Her voice lowers. “We can’t find Kelly’s mother at all. The bus driver went to the door and knocked, even tried around back. And Parker, bless his heart, is south of Charlotte. He said to call you.”

  To hell with my probation. No child should be left by themselves, wondering when someone will pick him or her up. “Give me the address.”

  ***

  By the time I arrive at school, check Kelly (who somehow remembers to call me Violet Rae) out and get her all buckled in, I’m a hot mess.

  Literally.

  I’m sweating and shaking, suddenly over-whelmed that I have no business driving at all. The thought of driving makes me nauseas, and I’m still in awe of the fact that I managed to get here in one piece or without a cop stopping me and hauling my law breaking self to jail.

  “Can we stop for ice cream?”

  I turn the key. The engine roars to life. Step one complete. “We have ice cream at home.”

  “What about the park? Can we go there and swing?”

  Pressing on the break and the clutch, I put the truck in reverse, then stomp on the gas. The truck half lurches, half jumps backwards.

  “We’ll play with the kitties at my house and I’ll take you for a walk.” Assuming we make it there. I’m not sure if I can get the darn thing out of reverse and into first gear.

  “Okay. But first I have to have a snack and do my homework. Then we have to read. Then I have to practice my ballet. Then I have to…”

  I half listen to Kelly, her chatter actually helping me focus. When I pull the truck out onto the highway in front of the school, I let out a cheer

  So does Kelly.

  “Can we listen to music?”

  I nod. “You pick the station.”

  Fifteen minutes later, I’m pulling into the driveway and parking under the carport. “Ready to get a snack?”

  Kelly doesn’t answer. I turn towards her, finding her head back, mouth wide open and eyes shut.

  Careful not to wake her, I unbuckle my seatbelt, get out of the truck and make my way to her side. In no time at all I have her hoisted on my hip, her little chubby arms wrapped around me. She smells like sunshine and crayons.

  Not even after I get us inside do I put her down. Instead I go sit in Nana’s rocking chair and rearrange Kelly in my lap. I gently pat her back until her body relaxes against mine.

  As I rock, I can’t help but think of the future children I’ll never have. And I can’t help but think of that night.

  Of me lying broken in a field, jagged edge of a windshield tearing into my womb and killing the baby I hadn’t known about.

  Chapter Twenty-One

  Violet

  I let Parker in the house around eleven that night. He smiles, big dimples appearing and takes his knit cap off, golden brown hair all disheveled underneath. Of course he toes out of his shoes and leaves them by the door.

/>   Why couldn’t I have met this brother first? The even-tempered, soft-spoken calm one.

  His skin’s a shade lighter than his hair and he has hazel eyes instead of Cole’s blue. One thing’s for sure, no matter who their dads might be, the Morgan boys are handsome as all get out.

  “Sorry, I’m so late,” he says in a low voice. “Cole never showed and I had to figure out payroll with Jane.”

  “That seems so unlike him.” Though it could be exactly like him. I’m not sure anymore. I would have thought that after two days of his mother being gone and me volunteering to watch Kelly after school and while Parker’s at his different jobs, he would have called before now. “Aren’t you getting worried?”

  Parker’s smile fades. “Yeah, but he’s with Beau, so…I guess we all deserve a break now and then.” He looks around. “Where’s the Bug?”

  “Asleep in bed.” He follows me to the guestroom. Kelly’s sprawled out on the mattress, wearing one of my t-shirts. Her hair is still damp from the bath I’d given her earlier that night. I’ve left the lamp on beside the bed so the monsters won’t get any ideas and try to sneak up on her. “Why don’t you let her spend the night and come get her in the morning, before school?”

  “Guess I could do that.”

  He steps back and I close the door. We start for the living room, dodging toys along the way. Suddenly, Parker trips over the Barbie car I’d bought for Kelly and does this weird hopping move, falling into me. Unable to take our combined weight, my legs give out and I fall to the floor, Parker lands on top of me as the back of my head smacks the floor.

  I wince and let out a moan. “Oh God that hurt.”

  “Sorry, R—”

  Suddenly he’s jerked off of me and I’m staring at the profile of his brother. My heart leaps in joy.

  Stupid heart.

  “Cole!” His name tumbles from my lips before I can stop it.

  *** *** ***

  Cole

  “Get your hands off me,” Parker growls, shoving me away and helping up Rae.

  “How about you keep your everything off her?” I growl back, hands up and ready to fight. I really don’t think my brother or Rae were doing anything wrong, but that was exactly the problem. I didn’t think; I reacted.

  “Cole,” Rae says, this time her voice is sharp. “Leave him alone. He tripped, tried to keep me from falling and —” She blows out a breath.“—I really don’t have to explain any of this to you.”